Endings and Beginnings
Dear Soul Dive,
You can’t have one without the other. Something must end for something new to begin. It’s a cosmic law that proves its own truth time and time again. We can try to circumvent it, and like all things, there can be an exception to the rule. But for the most part, and from what I’ve learned, the ending is required before the beginning can take place. There was only one in the beginning, and I’ll be the first to admit, the liminal space between the beginning and the end, or the end and the beginning, is challenging to sit in and can be a little hard to decipher.
Most of us, if I may generalize, might feel resistance to looking at endings as deaths. So dramatic, you may think, but that’s precisely what they are. Endings are forms of death, they come in all shapes and sizes and have the potential to be both emotionally charged and energetically light. Endings are final. When we refuse to accept them, putting whatever scenario, from the career to the relationship, on denial’s strongest life support, we are only delaying the inevitable from happening. By refusing to accept the end we cut the new beginning off at the knees.
We struggle with endings,
and death for that matter, because we are afraid. We fear the solitude, uncertainty and loneliness that exists on the other side of so many endings. We fear what we don’t know, we don’t know because we haven’t stepped into it, and we haven’t stepped into it because we haven't ended the thing that had to come first. We can trick ourselves into thinking some of life’s biggest pillars will just effortlessly flow into the next iteration without interruption. I not only see it all the time, but I’ve also done it. Trying to get a new job while working overtime in the one you have. Attempting a new relationship when you’re still committed to one. The list goes on.
The thing is, we so often struggle to end because we are unwilling to admit and accept death. So, we stay stuck, kidding ourselves into thinking we can breathe new life into the failure and somehow things will change. What if we could stop the charade and just let it go? Let the thing die so we can start to process and actually have the space to call in the new beginning? New beginnings thrive on completion and spaciousness. You see, it’s nearly impossible to admit and accept the ending because so often we don’t feel complete. That’s why we hang on and intubate the issue. A little force and a lot of control will change it! Nope, sorry. You’re only delaying the inevitable.
New beginnings need to know the old is complete; that it has ended, died and you’re not still trying to bring it back to life. New beginnings can feel it, like an energetic frequency as powerful as when you know, you know. They can sniff out the resistance and know that you haven’t quite let all the way go yet. Wherever you are, on the heels of an ending or cusping a new beginning, we get to practice both on the mat. We get to breathe life into what’s new and surrender into the wholehearted feeling of being complete at the end. Both are scary. Both are places you’ve never been. Both require equal parts effort and ease to maintain the delicate balance of knowing when it’s over and knowing when it’s about to start.
For all of the season's life invites us to experience, let the transition between Winter and Spring be a source of inspiration. If we didn’t go through the death of each winter, the showers and the flowers wouldn’t be as sweet.
See you on the mat, Soul Fam!
Big Love,